Summers were always a fertile season for productivity. We spent them in France and I came prepared. SAT flash cards. A “Beginner’s Guide to HTML” book. Ankle weights to spice up the workouts. Then at night we’d go get ice cream. But there was a problem. The Ice Cream shop was closed. For the ENTIRE MONTH. ## Where was the Work Ethic? I was incredulous. To close an ice cream shop – for a month – during PEAK tourist season? It was like a lottery winner refusing to claim their jackpot because they didn’t want the hassle of managing the money. And as a striving teenager committed to getting into an Ivy League, all I could ask was: > Where on earth was their Work Ethic? After all, I had built myself up to be a heat-seeking missile of punctuality, reliability, diligence and professionalism. I was consumed by learning, growing and excellence. And here was an Ice Cream shop turning away “free money.” ## Why do we vilify Leisure? The owners were not [prioritizing productivity](). Instead, they were [prioritizing leisure](). To my younger self, that was blasphemous. But today – deeply ensconced in midlife – I find myself wondering: __is there a sinister side of work ethic?__ One that breeds anxiety, injects you with [self-loathing](), robs you of the present and emotionally detaches you from [the people you love most](). I wonder. Work Ethic has always been my “secret weapon.” As a young kid, I made websites for local businesses. I taught myself how to invest in High School. I got into Yale. Majored in Computer Science. [Worked on Wall Street](). Got promoted to MD. Became a [moderately-successful entrepreneur](). I proudly place [these achievements]() on the pedestal of Work Ethic. ## What are the hidden costs of Work Ethic? The burnout of constantly and relentlessly pushing yourself to do more. (And [never being satisfied]().) The toll on my physical health. High blood pressure. Alopecia. Binge drinking. 15 years of 6 hours of sleep. Grinding all the enamels off of my teeth. (The list goes on.) And the [deleterious individualism](). Praying to the altar of the self. The flawed and isolationary belief that this was all “because of me.” Could it be that my single-minded focus on work come at a devastatingly steep cost? And would the owners of the Ice Cream shop be aghast if they were to see my NYC lifestyle? (Crossfit → Wall Street → Side Hustling → All while listening to audiobooks at 2x speed.) ## How’s your Life Ethic? I’ve come to believe that the Ice Cream store (and Europeans, generally speaking) had mastered a different ethic: __Life Ethic.__ Life Ethic takes [the Deferred Life Plan]() and flips it on its head. Instead of [waiting until retirement]() to travel, you take more time off today. Instead of eating on the go, you leisurely enjoy meals with loved ones. Instead of hiring life coaches, you have deep [emotional intimacy with your partner](), friends and community. And you take naps. (I mean, Americans thought it was nuts when we could “work out” in the middle of the day during the pandemic.) ## How much Life Ethic do you need? Now there’s an inherent paradox between Life Ethic and Work Ethic. Work Ethic is about doing. It’s about WHAT we do and WHAT [we accomplish](). And there’s nothing wrong with that. Life Ethic is [about being](). How we interact with leisure, loved ones, food, the arts and nature. So how do we build lives where Work Ethic and Life Ethic coexist in harmony?